Wow, what a great "Oh My God! I'm Free!" (OMGIF) session we had today! Lots of great sharing and participation! I started out with these thoughts:
This morning I was lying in bed thinking about this idea of change. I thought about the idea that I’m not supposed to want to change, I’m supposed to let all things be exactly as they are. It seems like such a paradox: to change or not to change! ha!
Through experience I’ve definitely learned all the ways that I can’t change:
1) By trying to change.
2) By hating myself into it.
3) I can’t change for other people or God, for that matter!
4) I can’t change by feeling that I “should”.
As I pondered these thoughts, I asked, “So Holy Spirit how do I change? Talk to me.” (And by the way, even when I think I know, I always ask because that opens me to deeper levels of growth.)
I heard the Inner Voice speak of a line from A Course in Miracles that I’m familiar with, “Seek not to change the world Sheryl, choose to change your mind. It’s all about making a decision.”
I thought for a moment about “decision” as Holy Spirit led me into prayer:
I must have decided wrongly, because I am not at peace.
I made the decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.
I want to decide otherwise, because I want to be at peace.
I do not feel guilty, because the Holy Spirit will undo all the
consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him.
I choose to let Holy Spirit decide for God for me.
I actually prayed that prayer with HS this morning and afterward I thought, “Wow, I never really thought of it like that.” I felt released.
I also had an “Aha!” moment because you see, I have prayed this prayer literally hundreds of times over the years whenever I have felt angry, irritated or obviously not at peace. This morning HS showed me that when I’m thinking thoughts about something or someone that needs to change, I am obviously not at peace.
Think about it: When tempted to engage in an area of compulsive or addictive behavior, we struggle with ourselves and thus, we are not at peace. Even thinking about needing to change reveals inner conflict. It’s not about whether we engage in it or not, it’s the struggle within that we bring to HS for healing. And once we are able to heal that struggle within ourselves, that then these compulsive behaviors absolve on their own.
The prayer involves awareness that I am not at peace, for whatever reason; and then the willingness to let go and choose again; and then, I let HS decide for God for me.
So this week, here’s a great practice. I’ll use myself as an example: It usually goes something like this: on the way home from work I’ll start thinking about what I want for dinner. I’ll think of having this or that, but feel like I should
have something else, and thus the inner struggle begins. I am not at peace here. And now I have a choice, I can pray this prayer and choose again.
As I thought about this as a way to practice, I then heard the inner voice say: “Sheryl, use this prayer and then do it or don’t do it, eat it or don’t eat it, but by praying the prayer you show willingness to let go of guilt and conflict.” Wow!
I started the session with these ideas and then Monica took the mic and shared about a 12 step meeting she had been to the night before. She brought up the serenity prayer:
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
She specifically brought up: “the courage to change the things I can”, and said that she feel that this is what these OMGIF sessions are about. I thought that was Great!
The Courage to Change the Things I can
. What we can change is our mind. We can make a decision to change our mind. In my willingness to recognize that I am not at peace because of a decision I have made, leads me to the courage to change the things I can.
Monica also shared about feeling powerless over emotions. I talked some about using prayer, but also we had a great decision about whether or not to use physical aids as in medication and such. I’m not going to write that out here, but if you’re interested there is some great stuff on the audio!
Then we talked about personal responsibility. I had this thought this morning. My first book is titled: “Oh My God. It’s Me!”
I have a feeling that my second book may be titled: “Oh My God! I’m Free!”
In order demonstrate, “Oh My God! I’m Free”, I must first come to the awareness of: “Oh My God. It’s Me!” I really cannot experience freedom until I first recognize that I’m the problem. Truly, it is only our thoughts that can imprison us. Our addictive, compulsive behaviors and thought patterns are not caused by something out there, but by our thinking. It’s up to us to make a new decision. Healing occurs in the present.
I ended the session with a prayer:
Let all things be exactly as they are.
in this thought
I recognize my Self as You created me.
in Love was I created,
and in Love will I remain forever.
What can frighten me when I let all things
be exactly as they are?
We had a really great discussion today about healing in general, with several people sharing really great ideas. There is much more on the audio than I have shared here.
Note: all of the blogs and audios for the "Oh My God! I'm Free!" sessions are posted on this blog: http://www.gifttomyself.blogspot.com